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| yeah so i know it has been an extremely LONG time since i have updated my xanga (i have been addicted to myspace and facebook as of late)...but here it finally is.
this past year has been pretty crazy but now my life is more hectic than ever...in a good way. 
BIG NEWS!!! i'm engaged!! and i will be getting married on august 12th here in greenwood, sc and you are all invited!! of course i know most of you are far away, but if you get the chance i would love for you to be there!! after that, i will be moving to cleveland, tennessee where my fiancee has one more year at lee university as a Bible & theology major. i'm so excited!
so let me know!!
also i'd love it if you wanna drop me a comment and let me know how you all are doing and what's going on in your lives nowa days. i miss you all!! | | |
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i got these lyrics from a friend's site. the words are so encouraging. i hope you are blessed by them as well.
RAGING SEA
Sometimes the journey makes you weary
Feels like a long winding road
Sometimes this life can lose it's meaning
But you might be surprised to find some hope
Maybe you're wondering where love is
You may feel it's far away from here
Maybe you're wondering where I am
But you might be surprised to find I'm near
~*~*~Chrous~*~*~
And when you're life is tossed and turning
And you are on the raging sea
I'll come and pull you from the water
Then you will know that you are free
So if you're stumbling through the valley
Or if you're tempted to give up the fight
Reach out your hand and I will lead you
I will be your strong arm in the night
Chorus
I'll come and pull you from the water
Then you will know that you are free
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| the one thing that i want the most right now is the one thing i am scared to death of. the thing that seems so beautiful and possible one minute, seems so ugly and impossible the next. it is the thing that i feel one minute capable of, only to be totally unsure of the next minute. i am scared of myself. scared of failure, scared of hurt, scared of making a mistake, scared to be vulnerable, scared of not being good enough. it is the thing i want to pursue, yet the thing that i feel compelled to run away from. the thing i give up on a million times in my head, but never quite in my heart. it's bigger than i thought. and i am smaller.
why do i feel so desperate to escape? what am i running from? when will i overcome my fear? will i ever? will i finally one day reach the place where i don't care anymore? will anyone come and believe in me? will i be rescued before the flame of hope within me fades and is gone forever? or will i run away...and life will pass me by and trample my dreams of beauty to be swept away like ashes in the wind?
sometimes it seems so close...and then so out of reach. | | |
| God is so faithful. In all my frustrations, in all my confusions
and desperations. When I feel so far from what I really want to
be...when I reach the end of my strength and the end of all the hope I
once had...He is there every time to pick me up and guide me one more
step. When I am weak, He is glorified.
I'm feeling better since my wreck. Except for the fact that I've
already spent more than $200.00 on Chiropractor bills and I still have
more adjustments to go. It has really helped my neck though.
I renewed my membership to "Curves" today. I'm happy about that
because now I'll be motivated to work out again. The weather has
been SO beautiful lately...the perfect balance between hot and
cold. I LOVE it!!
My car was pretty messed up in my wreck and now I am driving my
parent's mini van which can't make long trips and I am feeling stifled
and restless. I had plans for a trip to Tennessee this weekend,
but now I don't have a way to get there which is sort of
frustrating. Oh well. One of these weekends I'm just gonna
take off and drive to the beach.
I've been convicted lately about the little frivolous things that I
spend my money on when there is so much more I could be doing that is
more important. Why does money hold the key to the majority of
all our ambitions? That fact annoys me greatly.
I think I shall go running to clear my mind (hopefully) and to get in shape. I'm craving cheesecake. 
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"God does not call the qualified, but He qualifies the called."
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